>ROTFL!

Okay, are you really?  How are you typing?  Was it really that funny?  Has anything ever really been that funny?  I would argue that Monty Python and the Holy Grail is.  It will make you ROTF and L.  Nothing else.  Ever. 

I’m really being quite serious.  We need to start being honest in our electronic messages.  LOL?  Doubtful.  It might have cracked a smile, and for that you say that you’re laughing out loud.  That’s just deceptive.  You’re misleading people into thinking they’re funnier than they are. 

And LMAO?  How is that even possible?  Really think about it.  There are few things that can actually make that… come off.  Among them: liposuction and maybe a sickle.  But laughing?  Get serious. 

I submit that we move toward a more honest internet experience.  I’ll get us started:

NYNF = No, you’re not funny
ABNL = Amused, but no laughter
CAS = Cracked a smile
AFF = Actually fairly funny
IHLOLAPAL = I honestly laughed out loud and people are looking
COMD = Choking on my drink
LSHICB = Laughing so hard I can’t breathe*
IPAL = I peed a little

I’m open for more suggestions.  As long as you’re honest.

*THIS inspired LSHICB.  Because I was.  Disclaimer: PG-13, but really funny.